Friday, July 6, 2012

Bad Mood

This morning I am in a shitty bad mood.  For a few reasons.  One of them being that I gained weight (insert expletives here).  Not only did I gain weight, but I went backwards a decade.  I knew I would, but already being a bad mood, it just pushed me over the edge.  And it makes me mad at myself, because I know I gained weight because I ate poorly for a lot of the week.  Despite the fact that I know why I gained the weight, I'm becoming very discouraged.  I've stopped seeing positive changes and actually think you can see negative ones.  I feel huge again, and don't really like the sight of myself in the mirror.  I won't give up, but it's hard to keep fighting when it seems like I can't win.

The issue that I'm finding is that I am losing my will power when around other people (like a weekend in Pensacola, and a 4th of July BBQ... stupid homemade guacamole and chips).  This is definitely where I need to get myself back in check.  Otherwise I ate just fine this week, but I clearly overdid it enough in those few days to mess me up.  I even worked out quite a bit (5 times this week, phew!).

But what is really making me angry this morning is Time Warner Cable (you warned me Cassie and Sam).  My cable box has decided to start refreshing itself every few hours, and sometimes every few minutes, for no apparent reason.  I've tried "troubleshooting" with a remote technician several times and it's not working.  This morning my remote tech told me he'd schedule a service call... in 4 days.  And my window will be 8am-9pm.  Are you effing kidding me?  A 13 hour window?  It's completely unacceptable, and I am fairly certain that once I move (February, wee), I will be looking into other cable/internet providers.  Gah!

I think if I don't stop ranting I'm just going to work myself up even more, and I need to get ready for work.  Next week will be better, I hope.

Total weight lost: 54
To go: 46
Work outs this week: 5
Pounds to lose before next week: 6, eff!!!


  1. I'm sorry that you're having a bad day dear. Next week will be a big loss week.. I can feel it. Don't get discouraged. You're AMAZING!

  2. It's okay to gain weight. (fitness coach in me talking now) in fact, gaining weight may be beneficial right now. For one, it taught you what you need to continue to do to lose weight - it showed your weakness is social gatherings. Two, by gaining a little bit back, you can rech beyond your plateau in the next few weeks. Keep in mInd that you are working out more and your muscles are swollen. This will also show gain on the scale.

    I suggest maybe detox this weekend. Eat only veggies and lean chicken and detox tea. By Monday you'll feel great.

    Keep up the good work and go for a jog :)